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Welcome To Mentally Incontinent!
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"Still Mentally Incontinent" is a socially-edited book:
read Read:Read the stories in any order and laugh your ass off.
read Edit:Comment on grammar, spelling, plot, or just your opinion!
read Vote:Vote on your favorites to be in Joe's next book!

Learn more, or see how it worked with the first book!


Vote on Chapter 5:

Vote on Chapter 5:

Wheres Your Sense Of Adventure?
A Leisurely Day Along The Mighty Merced
Snagging Some Clips
I`ll Give Away The Ending - They Taste NOTHING Like Grapes
Clang Bang Clang



Results &
Comments


Votes: 93
Comments: 8


Who's Here Now?

Welcome, Anonymous

Registered Members: 4904

Max Members
for Book 2:
TBD


Who's Here Now:

Guests: 43
Members: 5
Total: 48


User Login


Stories:

Still Mentally Incontinent
The second MI Book

Stories posted for
Chapter 6:

* Respect Your Mother

Stories in contention for
Chapter 5:
(vote above)

* Where's Your Sense Of Adventure?

* A Leisurely Day Along The Mighty Merced

* Snagging Some Clips

* I`ll Give Away The Ending - They Taste NOTHING Like Grapes

* Clang Bang Clang


The book so far:

Chapter 1:
- Doing The Gay

Chapter 2:
- Never Saw THAT One Coming...

Chapter 3:
- Total Prosers

Chapter 4:
- 1-800-STALKER



If you want to read the contenders for past chapters (and read ALL the non-winning stories for the first book), register for an account! It's free, easy, and safe!


And what kind of author wouldn't give you samples of his first book?

Chapter 1:
- The Wal-Mart Story

Chapter 5:
- The Cows... They Talk!

Chapter 11:
- I'm Just Dying To Know You

All this and more can be found in:

Mentally Incontinent

The first book from this website




Would you like to be notified when new stories come out? Want to read all the stories that didn't make it into the last chapter (or the rest of the book... Or the last book)?
Register or Login!


The Forums:


Topics in red are in Anything Goes and may contain mature content. So... You know... Expect the worst.

 Newspaper Clipping

 The New M.I.L.F.O.M. RSVP thread

 When I was little I used to think...

 Joe made a heart stopper

 So I just did two stupid things...

 The Kewl Videos Thread

 You mean they were our friends all along?

 ATTN: easily-amused

 I found it interesting

 Blue Head Syndrome


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Author Message
Lady_Jez
Helloooooooo nurse!


Joined: Jul 22, 2004
Posts: 901
Location: Washington State

PostPosted: Tue Mar 22, 2005 1:43 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Lady_Jez wrote:
and I'll shut up now for being a <Bart Simpson>I will look up words before using them *repeat 1,000 times*</Bart Simpson>. icon_razz.gif


What the fuck?
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Beyond the reach of human range
A drop of hell, a touch of strange.
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homncruse
An Evil PHP Script
(Admin)
An Evil PHP Script<br><b>(Admin)</b>


Joined: May 05, 2003
Posts: 7698
Location: Western Washington

PostPosted: Tue Mar 22, 2005 2:10 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Lady_Jez wrote:
I've posted more on here lately than on immortal, my other forum, but that's also due to the disturbing lack of quality in the members and posts over there lately.


Wait... so you're saying we're full of quality? SWEET!

I suppose I can get rid of that silly word filter now... Blame Myopia icon_wink.gif
_________________
Help me GoogleBomb for Joe's publicity!

Joe the Peacock is WalMart.
Mentally Incontinent is WalMart.
Joe the Peacock is WalMart.
Mentally Incontinent is WalMart
Walmart
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Lady_Jez
Helloooooooo nurse!


Joined: Jul 22, 2004
Posts: 901
Location: Washington State

PostPosted: Tue Mar 22, 2005 2:53 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Ah. Well, I do know what it means and as far as I know I was using it properly. icon_razz.gif
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Beyond the reach of human range
A drop of hell, a touch of strange.
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MilamberCidone
Wal-Mart Hijacker!
Wal-Mart Hijacker!


Joined: Oct 27, 2004
Posts: 219
Location: Perth, Western Australia, Australia

PostPosted: Tue Mar 22, 2005 4:04 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

BLinX wrote:
MilamberCidone wrote:
BLinX wrote:
I need to play DoD more.


Hey Blinx - You an American or Australian DoDer?


American, but i ping about 90 on out of US servers if you ever want to play icon_wink.gif


Cool icon_smile.gif I'm on Dialup, so there's no chance I could ever play on outside-Aus servers. If you want, add me to your MSN (it's in my ICQ) or send me an email if you ever want to play. It will be interesting to see how you yanks play icon_razz.gif
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krsitnee
SNOWBALL FIGHT LOOOOOSER!!!

Bested in snowball combat against Team Peacock


Joined: Oct 08, 2004
Posts: 976
Location: NC

PostPosted: Tue Mar 22, 2005 8:34 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I love my mac.

I was broke but I got a check in the mail for $10 and I was happy.

Sometimes, I am not a nice person.

My hands are almost ALWAYS freezing.

I need a pedicure.

For that matter- I need a manicure too.

I didn't take my vitamin today.
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boredatworkgirlie
Declined Homncruse's Offer of Never-Ending Love


Joined: Mar 02, 2005
Posts: 529
Location: Toronto

PostPosted: Wed Mar 23, 2005 12:23 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I have no complaints today

I have decided not to assume the worst.

I will not dwell on bad poker beats.
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jahnbodah
<insert random generic useless link here>


Joined: Dec 11, 2004
Posts: 468
Location: Columbus, ohio

PostPosted: Wed Mar 23, 2005 12:25 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

The lepurchaun says I can fly!

I believe it/him!

JahnBodah goes to jump off roof


...Ten minutes later...

*ouch*

YOU LIED YOU LITTLE SON OF A... *stab* *stab*

I killed a lepurchan...

Frank the rabbit is mad at me for killing his friend...
_________________
WOOHOO!!!! A place for my signature! ...ok...
...lets see...um...
JahnBodah
...Yep! There we go! ...wow, that handwritting is kinda sloppy...I hope people can read it...
...?
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jahnbodah
<insert random generic useless link here>


Joined: Dec 11, 2004
Posts: 468
Location: Columbus, ohio

PostPosted: Wed Mar 23, 2005 12:14 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

1. The Japanese eat very little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or Americans.

2. The Mexicans eat a lot of fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or Americans.

3. The Japanese drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or Americans.

4. The Italians drink excessive amounts of red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or Americans.

5. The Germans drink a lot of beers and eat lots of sausages and fats and suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or Americans.

CONCLUSION: Eat and drink what you like. Speaking English is apparently what kills you.
_________________
WOOHOO!!!! A place for my signature! ...ok...
...lets see...um...
JahnBodah
...Yep! There we go! ...wow, that handwritting is kinda sloppy...I hope people can read it...
...?
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DJ_Mittens
I look sexy in my Joe's Jeans™ Peacock Trousers
(changed by Patgrun)


Joined: Feb 17, 2004
Posts: 4711
Location: Winnipeg, skeeter capital of the world.

PostPosted: Thu Mar 24, 2005 1:22 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I have to let out my suit pants, because I've grown fat over the past five years. I need it for Monday because I'm going to Granny funeral. Hooray.

I need a better job.

I need a car that can actually function properly in the winter.

I need to meet a girl who has at least fewer mental illnesses than myself.
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Most problems can be solved through violence. Those that cannot are not worth solving.
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Lizzy
Tipper of cows


Joined: Nov 16, 2004
Posts: 457
Location: Normal, Illinois

PostPosted: Thu Mar 24, 2005 2:31 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I need to stop goofing off on MI at work.

I need to get a new cell phone.

I need to get something in my house to eat other than frozen waffles.

I need to post more. This is numero uno.
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jezibelle
Pink-Haired Pirate
Pink-Haired Pirate


Joined: Jul 19, 2003
Posts: 1625
Location: Ontario

PostPosted: Thu Mar 24, 2005 2:56 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I am still confused as to how Criminology and Criminal Justice is not an "approved" program for working at Corrections Canada.

My cat is sleeping on my lap and making it hard to type.

Only 13 more days before class is over!
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homncruse
An Evil PHP Script
(Admin)
An Evil PHP Script<br><b>(Admin)</b>


Joined: May 05, 2003
Posts: 7698
Location: Western Washington

PostPosted: Thu Mar 24, 2005 3:24 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

jezibelle wrote:
I am still confused as to how Criminology and Criminal Justice is not an "approved" program for working at Corrections Canada.


Probably for a similar reason as to why an Associate's in Computer Science only requires ONE beginner's computer programming course, and absolutely no other computing courses.
_________________
Help me GoogleBomb for Joe's publicity!

Joe the Peacock is WalMart.
Mentally Incontinent is WalMart.
Joe the Peacock is WalMart.
Mentally Incontinent is WalMart
Walmart
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jezibelle
Pink-Haired Pirate
Pink-Haired Pirate


Joined: Jul 19, 2003
Posts: 1625
Location: Ontario

PostPosted: Thu Mar 24, 2005 3:29 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

homncruse wrote:
jezibelle wrote:
I am still confused as to how Criminology and Criminal Justice is not an "approved" program for working at Corrections Canada.


Probably for a similar reason as to why an Associate's in Computer Science only requires ONE beginner's computer programming course, and absolutely no other computing courses.


I hate university.
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Kamikaze666K
Ginger Lynn Video Smuggler
Ginger Lynn Video Smuggler


Joined: Jan 18, 2005
Posts: 74

PostPosted: Thu Mar 24, 2005 4:51 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

My foot is asleep.

I bought Brothers In Arms for Xbox today.

I was going to say something else but I forgot what it was.
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boredatworkgirlie
Declined Homncruse's Offer of Never-Ending Love


Joined: Mar 02, 2005
Posts: 529
Location: Toronto

PostPosted: Thu Mar 24, 2005 7:42 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

My puppy ran away last night, I cried.

I'm having a crappy day.

I don't think that I'm ever going to see her again - Tucker, I love you!!!
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This site and all contents herein ©, TM, ¥ , €, ¢, ± and everything else 2003-2007 Joe Peacock (unless otherwise noted). Mentally Incontinent is a registered trademark of Joe Peacock, so feel free to steal my logo and stuff but be prepared to get email that says you shouldn't. Any and all content present currently or added to this site is immediately licensed to Joe Peacock and Mentally Incontinent to do whatever the hell I want with it, but ownership (copyright) remains with the originator of the material. PLEASE Feel free to print out, email, post on your site or otherwise give any story on this site to anyone you like, as long as credit is given to the author and www.mentallyincontinent.com. Reproducing a story on this site without giving proper credit, charging for a story on this site, and swearing at your mother are big no-no's and will get you in deep trouble (and probably slapped), so don't do it. Also, I'm obligated to tell you that VERY OLD portions of this web site engine's code are Copyright © 2002 by PHP-Nuke (but I'll be damned if I could actually point to any left on this site that still exists as the PHP-Nuke guys wrote it). All Rights Reserved.


Still Mentally Incontinent: A Penguin / Gotham Book