Part 13 - 5 Weeks After
"I've been working from seven to eleven every night, It kinda makes my life a drag... " Led Zeppelin, Since I Been Loving You
I didn’t have to look up to know she was there – her presence was such that it was felt across the room long before you ever laid eyes on her. I can’t honestly say that I was surprised she showed up – I’d been half expecting it all day, and now, there she stood. As I sat there, my eyes staring down at my fingers as they rapped and tapped with a mind of their own, I could see in my peripheral vision her form standing in the doorway leaning one shoulder against the frame. I could see in my mind her face, a faint grin adorning it, her flaming hair lightly brushing against her cheek as she tilted her head toward the doorframe and rested it there. Forever we danced this silent dance, me aware of her presence, her aware of my awareness of her presence; neither of us having what it took to say what needed to be said to one another.
Finally, I took the step my mind, my heart and my soul begged me not to take.
“Whatever do you want, Darina?” I asked with a low growl. I heard a light chuckle in return.
“I was just wanderin’ how you’ve been this fine marnin’,” I heard her say in spite of her thick Irish accent. I sighed as I slowly raised and turned my head to face her. She grinned wider as she sipped from her mug o’ heavily spiked coffee.
I shook my head and grumbled. “Fine, I’ll ask,” I said after about a minute of staring each other down. “What in God’s name are you talking about?”
“Oh, nothin’,” She said a little too wistfully. “I was just curious as to how much higher ye production levels are today.”
“And why would you wonder that,” I asked as I placed my chin in my right palm and my right elbow on the desk (a little too forcefully, at that. I think she noticed that I’d clacked my lower and upper teeth together in an effort to express disdain with my chin-resting, and I’m sure it gave her considerable pleasure).
“Well,” she said, taking another sip from her cup and smacking her lips for effect, “I’m sure yer gettin’ a lot more done, since ye can’t spend as much time on yer chat.”
I looked at her much the same way a Labrador looks at you when you change a ball from one hand to another a little too quickly. “Huh?” I asked, leaving my jaw hanging open.
“Yer chat. Ye can’t connect to it, can ye?”
“Not that it’s any of your business, but yeah, I’m connected to it right now.”
Her face twisted on her skull in patterns that rival Rorschach tests in terms of sheer oddity. “But that can’t be!”
“And why not?” I asked.
“I turned it off,” she said as she released the strain on my doorframe and brought herself upright.
“No, you didn’t,” I replied.
“Yes, I did,” she demanded.
“
NO, you did NOT,” I said again.
“Darina,” I said as I waved her closer. She stepped lightly over to my desk and took a look at my screen as line after line of chat-filled IRC text scrolled up the screen. She looked confused and angry as her fair face became a bright red, nearly matching her long curly locks. “Now, why on Earth would you think that you’d turned it off?”
“I… uh…” she stammered.
“Yes?”
“I… I just... did?”
“Not good enough,” I answered my tone stark and gruff. “FIRST, I’d like to know how you thought you had the necessary number of IQ points required to block access, and SECOND, how you think you had the right to do so.”
“I was… Er, ye see, I…” she said, nearly drooling as she did so.
“Out with it.”
“Look!” She exclaimed as she drew back and stomped her feet. “Yer always pullin’ some sort of shite with me, and I wanted to do the same to ye! Ye can’t be mad! Ye deserved it!”
I sighed loudly. “Darina, Darina, Darina…”
“Oh, stuff it!” She said as she stormed back to the confines of her little carpet-walled cave of an office. I simply shook my head and chuckled as I returned to my “work”.
‹blozilla› GODDAMMIT Cray, quit asking for people to send you music in here! There’s a place called Camelot Music, you should check it out!
‹artful_soul› PATTON!!!!!! WHERE R U????
‹Mitchell› Hehe, arty, he’s prolly gone to the potty.
I chuckled a little.
‹Patton-X› Nah, annoying coworker woman showed up. Had to handle her.
‹artful_soul› PATTON! I missed u
‹Mitchell› WB Patton
‹@antigone_Sq› Welcome back, BRB
*antigone_Sq has been marked as AWAY (BRB)
‹Patton-X› Thanks antigone, Mitchell, arty
‹Cray› Patton, I haven’t gotten that Rollins CD you sent when did you send it did you check my address
‹blozilla› CRAY! STFU MAN.
‹Mitchell› So Patton, how’s that thing with you and Orange?
‹artful_soul› What thing?
‹Cray› F.U. BLOMAMA. I can say what I want
‹Mitchell› Has she called you or anything?
‹blozilla› Cray, I’m going to build a grenade out of 1’s and 0’s and digitally blow you the fuck up if you don’t shut up.
*antigone_Sq has kicked blozilla (Watch the potty mouth)
*antigone_Sq has returned
‹Patton-X› Yeah, we’ve talked.
‹artful_soul› What thing, Patton? What are you talking about?
*blozilla has joined #resort
‹blozilla› WTF! Why’d you kick me, antigone_Sq?
‹Cray› Because you’re a dickhead
‹@antigone_Sq› Because of your language. You know the rules.
*antigone_Sq has kicked Cray (You too, Cray.)
*Cray has joined #resort
‹Cray› Sorry. He’s a jerk.
‹blozilla› You’re a jerk, you pirating cheapskate MF
‹@antigone_Sq› Enough. Both of you – or you’re banned.
‹@Adam_12› Yes. Behaviour, please.
*Adam_12 has returned
Hey! I hadn’t seen Adam in weeks! What a sight for sore eyes!
‹Patton-X› Heya, Adam. Welcome back!
‹Mitchell› WB Adam. How’s it feel to be back home in sunny ol’ England?
‹@Adam_12› It’s England, only not sunny :) How’s Roswell?
‹Mitchell› No aliens today outside of the ones laying asphalt.
I’m ashamed to admit it, but I laughed at that.
‹@antigone_Sq› Mitchell! That was terrible!
‹Mitchell› :P
‹artful_soul› WILL SOMEONE TELL ME WHATS UP W/PATTON AND AGENTORANGE PLZ
‹Patton-X› arty, it’s nothing. Trust me. :)
‹@Adam_12› Oh, Patton, that’s right! How was your trip with AgentOrange? I don’t think I’ve talked to you since you left.
‹artful_soul› OH I SEE It’s nothing, huh? I see. FINE BE THAT WAY PATTON
‹Patton-X› So much for keeping a low profile…
Just then, I heard a small *ding* signaling that I had an instant message. I looked at the other monitor to see a small box with Darina’s ICQ number at the top and the words “I’m sorry.” written inside. With a slight smirk, I alt+tabbed to that window and typed:
It’s okay. How’d you get my password?
“Rick gave it to me,” she replied, referring to the guy who was hired to do system administration work but had done anything BUT since he was hired four months ago. I smiled as I typed back to her:
Would you like me to show you what you did wrong?
“Sure,” the textbox replied. I fired up a remote console and signed in on Darina’s machine. I took control of her mouse, opened up an Internet Explorer window, and typed “10.0.0.1” into the URL box, bringing up the firewall. I logged in using my username and password and looked over the rule she’d put in place. Immediately, I cracked up laughing.
Darina, dear, you can’t just write “Block Chat” into the filter and hope it does so. You have to actually give it an address to block, as well as a host to filter against.
“Oh” the box said with a chime. “I did not know.”
I know you didn’t know, that’s why I’m showing you. Observe:
I typed several addresses into the filter textbox:
http://news.bbc.co.uk,
http://ireland.com,
http://rte.ie – every Irish news site that I knew Darina frequented - as well as the IP addresses for ICQ and AOL Instant Messenger. I then put Darina’s IP address in the “host” box and clicked “OK”. Immediately, her name became grey in both AOL and ICQ, and within seconds I’d changed my password and signed out of both the firewall control panel and her machine. It took about ten seconds before a fiery howl that somewhat resembled my name emanated through the halls of our office building. Satisfied, I returned to my chat session.
‹@Adam_12› I think I scared him off. :(
‹artful_soul› I KNEW THERE WAS MORE
‹Mitchell› arty, lay off the caps. And yeah, of course there’s more. Maybe he didn’t want to talk about it.
‹@antigone_Sq› BRB
*antigone_Sq has been marked as away (BRB)
‹Cray› No, YOU’RE a stupid jerk, Blowhard!
‹blozilla› Shut UP you whiny insolent retard.
‹@Adam_12› That’s it. Either one of you start one more time, you’re banned.
‹Patton-X› Back :)
‹blozilla› Fine, take his side. I’m going to eat, I’ll bbl – when asshead isn’t around.
*blozilla has left #resort (FOOOOOOOOOOOOOD)
‹Mitchell› WB Patton.
‹artful_soul› YOU
‹artful_soul› oops.
‹artful_soul› you have a lot of explaining to do Patton!
I sighed and took a drink of cold, stale coffee. Wincing as I forced myself to swallow, I prepared myself for the conversation I knew was coming.
‹Patton-X› I do?
‹Mitchell› No he doesn’t. It’s his business, you should stay out of it.
‹@Adam_12› I’ll admit I’m curious, but I won’t pry.
‹Patton-X› Nah, it’s ok Mitchell.
‹artful_soul› TELL MEEEEEEEEEEEEE
‹@Adam_12› Everyone hush, Patton has the floor. :)
I cleared my throat. I have no idea why I cleared my throat, but I did. So I thought I’d mention it.
‹Patton-X› Basically, AgentOrange and I met up and had some fun. She’s back home now. End of story.
‹@Adam_12› .....
‹artful_soul› well. That tells us a lot.
‹Cray› Bullshit.
*antigone_Sq has returned.
‹@antigone_Sq› Cray, I would kick you, but I agree. Bullshit.
Wow. In the nearly two years I’d been chatting in #resort, Antigone had NEVER cursed. It must have been pretty obvious that I was completely full of crap.
‹Mitchell› You guys, leave him alone. He’ll tell us what he wants to tell us.
‹artful_soul› You’re only saying that because he’s already told you everything, Mich-HELL.
‹Mitchell› No he hasn’t. I didn’t pry like you are.
‹Patton-X› Mitchell and I have known each other for several years, so yeah, I’ve told him some stuff. And I’ll tell you what I told him – We had a good time. The good time came to an end, as all good times do, and she went home. That’s it. That’s all.
‹artful_soul› Yeah. I’m sure you did.
*artful_soul has left #resort (I DON’T LOVE YOU ANYMORE PATTON-EX)
*artful_soul has joined #resort
‹Patton-X› wow. Well, that was certainly ceremonious.
‹@Adam_12› I’m assuming the trip has had nothing at all to do with her recent absence? You know… since ‘That’s all’….
‹Patton-X› Well, she told me that she was going to be offline for a while. We’ve talked some via phone, so I don’t think she’s mad about anything.
‹Mitchell› Maybe she’s just taking a hiatus.
‹Patton-X› yeah, she’s just taking some time offline.
‹Cray› Did you guys… you know, do it?
‹Mitchell› Cray, go F yourself. That’s none of your business.
‹Patton-X› No, Cray. We did not “do it.”
‹artful_soul› Good.
‹@Adam_12› Well, I hope you two did have fun, and I hope all is well between you.
Yeah. Me too.
It was about 8:00 PM when my manager, Gary, walked in during his routine sweep of the building before locking up and going home. With a sigh, he performed his regular routine as he pinched the pleats of each pant leg between his index finger and thumb and lifted as he sat. “Burning the midnight oil again, I see?” he said with a slight smile.
“Yeah, Got a lot to take care of here,” I said dismissively.
“Been putting in a lot of hours lately,” he said as he slowly scanned the room, looking over each of the posters I had hanging from the wall; lingering just a tad too long over the “Ghost In The Shell” Major Kusanagi double-size hanging just to my right.
“Yeah,” I replied as I pried my eyes away from the monitor and looked over at him. “Like I said, lots to take care of here.”
“Sure,” He said with a chuckle, “Like unblocking Darina’s access to her Irish news websites?”
I chuckled along with him. “No, I’m afraid those aren’t on my list of immediate to-do’s, Gary.”
“Well, don’t make her suffer too long,” he replied, carrying his chuckle just past the point one would if they actually found the situation funny. With a heavy, fatherly sigh, he placed his elbows on his knees and leaned forward. “Wanna talk about it?”
I acted confused. “Talk about what?”
“Whatever it is that’s bothering you,” he replied.
“And what makes you think there’s something bothering me?”
“Well,” He said, smacking his lips a little, “Before you left for vacation, you worked a normal schedule. Ever since you came back, you’ve been working 16 hour days. You hardly talk to anyone; you’re a hermit here in your office. It’s… It’s not like you, Joe.”
“I’m taking my work seriously for a change,” I answered nonchalantly. “I thought you’d be proud.”
“Come on…”
“What? I want to get ahead on some things. There’s been some neat stuff coming down the pike; all this ASP and Java stuff, you know. Programming stuff.”
“Sure, son. Sure,” he said like a man who’d probably said exactly what I was saying before in his life, for the exact same reasons. “Well, I didn’t mean to pry.” He began to lift himself out of the nook he’d cleared for himself on my couch and make his departure.
“Wait…” I said. The look on his face when I said it indicated that he already knew I was going to. He relaxed himself, crossing his left leg over his right. “I’ve been… I’ve had some, you know… Girl trouble.”
“Hey,” He replied. “I’m on my third wife. Trust me when I say, ‘They’re ALL trouble.’”
I laughed a little, then continued. “Well, I was… Seeing this girl, right? And everything seemed to be going perfectly, you know? I was REALLY into her… Like, I think I love her. No – I am in love with her, man. But my friends hate her… They’ve completely ostracized me because of her… And we haven’t talked since she flew back home… I…”
“What?” He said after several seconds of my throat trying to creak out the next part.
“Nothing… It’s just… You’re my manager, Gary. I don’t know. I don’t feel like I should be telling you all about my private stuff, you know?”
“I understand completely,” he replied in a calm, even tone. He then stood up and made his way to the door. I was just beginning to feel like a complete jackass for snubbing this man who probably just wanted to help out when, suddenly, he turned back to me and asked, “Just… Let me give you one piece of advice, If I may?”
“Sure,” I replied.
“You said you think you love her, right?”
“Yeah,” I answered.
“Well…” he said, “Love requires no thought, Joe. Take it from an old man with a little bit of experience in this arena – if you have to think about loving someone, you’re probably trying too hard.”
Now, this was sound advice. Very solid stuff; spoken from a man who’d seen and done a lot of what I was going through now. But it didn’t really hit me at all. In fact, I dismissed each and every word of it without even bothering to put it all together as one complete sentence. After a few moments of looking me up and down and most likely figuring I’d just ignored what he’d said, he threw this out:
“Being in love with a person is one thing… Being in love with the idea of being in love, that’s something else entirely. Be sure you… Well, just make sure you know where you stand, Joe.”
And with that, he ducked his eyes and butted the base of his palm lightly against the doorframe of my office, then turned and walked out into and down the hallway, leaving with me some heavy words of wisdom to ponder.
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